Stuck between two bad boys

I have no idea if it’s Xavier’s confession making me feel this emotion or if it’s the reality that no matter what he thinks he feels, we can never be together. I hated the way I randomly thought of it; I could be doing just anything and I’d get hit with it, that no matter how extensively we kiss or do stuff, it wasn’t in our favor.

The library was the only quiet spot I could get so I walked there and gave the librarian my ID. I dropped my bags and put my phone in my pocket. I needed to think so I took a seat and pretended like I wanted to read a book.

I walked to the end of the shelf and searched for a book cover that caught my interest. I stretched and picked up a book on Teenage hormones.

“Duck it,” I blurted.Copyright Nôv/el/Dra/ma.Org.

I turned from the shelve and picked a seat. I sat at the outright end and fixed my gaze on the book. I flipped through the first pages and just paused when my eyes caught the word Infatuation. I was thinking of Xavier, the definition matched what I felt for him but more than it fitted him, it fitted Devin. Trust me, I was confused and didn’t need someone to explain that to me.

I honestly couldn’t believe he confessed to being in love with me. My jaw dropped open when he said it. I stood shocked and was unable to move. I still can’t find the right reaction. After he confessed, he grabbed me and kissed me. I found myself right now, I was touching my bruised lips and reminiscing about his possessive kiss.

His lips possessed mine and he kept saying he loves me so much. To an extent, I regret not kissing him back, I was so scared about getting caught that I didn’t kiss him as I needed him. Xavier was everything, his stare on my skin made me feel like I was on top of the world.

Whenever he held me, I didn’t want him to leave me, whenever I slept, I wanted to wake up to him staring at me. Crazy but whenever I touched myself, I moaned his name imagining it was him fvcking me. It was that bad, my thoughts of him touching me turned me on.

Everything felt crazy when our certainty hits. It always reminds me how impossible it was to have Xavier despite my cravings for him.

“I’m not related to Dad.”

“He’s married to her but didn’t birth me. I’m not his blood. Right?”

I didn’t realize how loud I said that till the girl sitting across me gave me a blank look, I was obviously talking like I was insane and disturbing her read.

“Ourgh, sorry,” I mouthed and turned my gaze back to the book. I raised it and used it to cover my face. I was pretending to read when I couldn’t focus.

Since Mom was only married to Dad and he wasn’t my father, I thought of the likelihood of being with Xavier. We could elope after college or maybe, we could wait till we get a job and then get married. That way we would be adults and have a say in what we wanted.

What if Mom divorced Dad and got back with my birth father? I’d be able to have something with Xavier.

I couldn’t believe I was thinking of the possibility of Mom going back to James. If she went back to James, she would get everything she wanted because James was rich. He had everything and wouldn’t hesitate to give her the world.

If James took me then he would have my mom too; there was no way mom would let me stay with James alone. Jack’s plan was to get me, to come back and have his daughter and I was seeing the possibility of that now.

“If I let him take me, mom would come along, and then… Fuck, no!” I said in an undertone.

“How about mom leaves with James? That way I’d be left alone with Dad and Xavier.”

My thoughts were getting more chaotic but I was getting interested in what I had in mind. I planned to get mom to accept James then that way, her marriage with Dad would get dissolved and I’d be able to have an accepted relationship with Xavier. That way, Xavier would no longer be my stepbrother.

A smile crept on my lips and I let out a content chuckle. I took the note from the desk and returned it to the shelve. I checked my phone to see if Xavier texted but he didn’t. After we kissed yesterday, he promised to make sure I was fine and said he’d text me at school.

At the thought of the kiss, I touched my lip. It felt sore and reminded me of how his kisses passionately owned my lips.

His grip was tight and threatening, I couldn’t move. I swallowed hard the lump in my throat. I was unable to stop my chest from rising and falling so rapidly. I didn’t know what was going to happen but I knew I wanted him as much. My fingers dug into his back in response to the hotness he made me feel between my thigh.

He made me crave him and I couldn’t help it. What Xavier made me feel was powerful. His effect on my body was mind-blowing, my nipples hardened under my clothes and I gasped impatiently. I didn’t want the moment to end but it ended rather too quickly.

Now I’m sitting down regretting why I didn’t kiss him back and get his hands in my clothes. I loved it when he held my waist and held me tight against himself. I felt him get hard standing between me and I swallowed hard. We were playing games with our hormones and sooner or later we’d face the consequences.

Mom and Dad didn’t weren’t rich. I mean if they were, I wouldn’t be sharing a room with Xavier and being tempted to succumb to his forceful passionate kisses. Our apartment was spacious but it wasn’t the ideal house we should be living in. Mom was working two shifts and Dad was trying his best too but we just weren’t there yet.

Xavier was thinking of starting a shift while attending school. I never thought of that because I was still pretty young.

I was lost in my thoughts, thinking randomly and staring at the book.

“Emily.”

“Emily?” a voice called after I felt his touch on my skin.