Pleasure Unbound

When I arrived home, I found Mom asleep on the couch, the TV on some home show, which reminded me I needed to mow the grass in the morning. As I entered my room, I threw my shirt into an overloaded laundry basket. I pursed my lips and sighed, walking over to it and picking it up, then headed down the hall to my mom’s room. With both her basket and mine in hand, I made my way down two flights of stairs to the basement.

I’d neglected the house chores over the last few days, thanks to whatever had taken control of me. There was no denying it-I wasn’t myself. The emotions boiling inside me shook my mind from my depression, but the lusted-out beast who craved a woman beyond sanity?

He freaked me out.

After starting up a load, I headed back up the stairs. Cassie had cleaned up the kitchen before she left, reminding me my sister rocked. I walked into the den and sat down at the desk, sighing as I moved the mouse to wake up the computer. I picked up a stack of mail and flipped through it.

I threw medical bills to the side as I pored through everything else. I loved the ones with big bold letters “Patricia Lynch, you’re a winner!” Very important mail. I made sure to tear it up and toss it into the trash.

I stretched my neck out and logged on to the computer. The first thing I did was check my mom’s accounts, and I didn’t like the number I saw.

“Shit.” Her insurance couldn’t keep up with the costs of her treatments, especially with her being on unpaid medical leave. Between my dad’s hospital stay and now her illness, there wasn’t much money left. I logged on to my account and hit the transfer button. I’d built up a nice savings in preparation to buy a house with Monica, and now it was going to help ease my mom’s financial stress. “Jared?”

Looking over my shoulder, I saw Mom standing in the doorway.

“Nice nap?”

She slumped down in the sofa chair and wrapped a blanket around her shoulders. “Cassie put me in a food coma.”

My lip quirked up. She was eating-a good sign. “How’re you feeling?”

“Tired.” She sighed and looked over at the desk. “What are you doing?”

“Paying the bills.”ConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .

She pursed her lips. “Thank you.” Her head tilted as she looked at me. “There’s something different about you this week.”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

Silence stretched between us.

“You going to tell me, or do I have to play twenty questions?”

I rubbed my face and lifted my arms in a stretch. “It’s… complicated.” I sighed. “I met someone.”

She perked up, a smile forming on her face as she sat a little straighter. “And? Tell me about her.”

My face heated up. There was no way I could tell my mother about what had been going through my mind.

“Her name is Hope, and she’s pinup-girl gorgeous.”

Her eyes widened. “Pinup? That’s different. What else?”

I blew out a breath. “She works at Union Jack’s and visits St. Joan of

Arc.”

“And? You’re killing me here, Jared.”

I grimaced. “It’s because that’s all I’ve got. The truth is, I don’t know much about her, but we have this uncontrollable attraction.” She arched her drawn-on eyebrow. “Condoms are your friend.” “Mom!” I stared at her in stunned disbelief.

“What? Do you want to have a child with a woman you just met?”

I held my hands up. “Who said I didn’t want to get to know her?”

She leaned back. “Why haven’t you yet?”

I sighed and shook my head. It wasn’t something I wanted to tell my mother, but now that she knew about Hope, she wasn’t going to let up. “Because every time I’m near her, all I can think about-all I can feel-is intense lust.” My jaw clenched, hands flexing into fists. “And it controls me.”

She nodded, staring at me for a moment. “Have you asked her out?”

“Not yet.”

“Well, don’t be an asshole.”

“Mom!”

“You keep saying my name like that.” She chuckled. “I’m not stupid. Plus, you’re over thirty now, and you lived with a woman for five years. I know you are very familiar with sex and how it works.”

I rubbed my face again and shook my head. “You’re not supposed to be so casual about it.”

She shrugged. “You’re an adult.”

“It’s just weird.”

“You think that means I’m going to continue to sugar-coat things for you?”

“No, it’ll just take some getting used to.”

“Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. Cassie’s having a girl.”

I beamed at her. “Yeah? That’s awesome.”

For some reason, it was that bit of news that made it hit home-I was going to be an uncle. My little sister was going to be a mom. I was going to be uncle to a little girl and bound to spoil her rotten.

She nodded. “Now, you’re the oldest-where’s your contribution?”

My mouth dropped open. “Who just told me to make sure I use a condom?”

She shrugged. “What can I say? I want grandbabies.”

“Unbelievable. Why didn’t you ever say anything before?”

“I liked Monica in the beginning, but she was very self-centered and turned out to be a lying, cheating whore. She wouldn’t have been a good mother.”

I leaned back in shock. Amazing how the truth came out from those close to you on how they felt about your girlfriend once the relationship was over. “Tell me how you feel.”

“She used you.” She leaned back and settled into the chair, a mischievous smile spreading on her face. “Have I ever told you how your father and I met?”

I nodded and sat back as well, wondering where she was headed. “At a party in college.”

“That was where, but not the how.”

My brow scrunched. “Okay.”

“My sophomore year, my friend Beth took me to a party. From the moment I walked in, my skin crawled. Not in a bad way, but it tingled.”

I knew exactly what she meant-I’d experienced it at a growing rate for days.

“We made it into the kitchen, and my eyes locked on a gorgeous set of blue eyes, then bam!” Her eyes were bright before softening.

“I remember Dad saying he got caught in that moment.” The memory was a fond one, my father describing the emotion that came over him. When I was a kid, it was like a fairy tale for boys as he explained to me that cooties weren’t such a bad thing.

“There’s a lot he didn’t tell you. But I have to ask-did you ever feel anything like that, what did you do with this girl, with Monica?”

I shook my head. “There was attraction, just like with every girl I dated before her.”

Mom was more animated during our conversation than I’d seen her in weeks or months. “That right there tells me there could be so much more with this girl.”

“Why?”

“Because half an hour after I entered the door to that house, I was in the bathroom having sex with your father, and I didn’t even know his name.”

My jaw dropped open. “Wait, what?”

“And his girlfriend of a year had come to the party with him.”

“Holy shit! Seriously?”

She chuckled. “No, but that’s the way I always thought it would’ve gone if he hadn’t been in a relationship.”

I blew out a hard breath. She was trying to kill me. “What did happen then?”

“He avoided me all night. At some point, I’d gone to use the restroom, and when I came out, he was walking down the hall. It was narrow, and being a gentleman, he gave me the right of way. Before I made it past him, his arm flew in front of me. The struggle was evident even as he caged me with his arms against the wall. I wanted him to kiss me, desperately wanted it. I thought I’d die if he didn’t.” She touched her lips with the tips of her fingers, almost like she could still feel it. “He was so close I felt the heat of his skin, the zinging spark between us.”

“How did he stop?” I’d become enraptured by the story because I knew the struggle she was talking about.

She sighed. “Someone called his name, and he woke from his trance.

He was so angry with me after that.”

“Why was he angry with you?”

“Well, he later admitted it wasn’t me, but himself. Two days after the hallway incident, he broke up with his girlfriend, and he blamed me for it.

He had his whole future with that girl laid out-he planned to propose.

When he saw me, everything changed.”

“Wait, I missed something. He broke up with the girl he planned to marry two days later?”

She nodded. “You know your father was a good man. It was love at first sight, though he didn’t want to believe it. Having those feelings for someone other than her, he knew then it wasn’t right with her. For weeks we bumped into each other on campus, and he became even more upset with each encounter. He said he couldn’t seem to get away from me.”

“How did that make you feel? I mean, what was going through your head?”

“It was an attraction on a level I only ever experienced with him. It was confusing because I thought about him all the time-the worst crush ever. Three weeks after the party, in the middle of the night, he showed up at my sorority house. Three months later, you were conceived.”

“That was fast.”

She shrugged. “There’s a reason I wanted you to know all this. Times might not have always been easy, and though we knew we were soul mates, we were also human and fought. If any of what I’ve described is the feeling

you get with this girl, don’t let anything stop you.”

I shook my head. “It was not love at first sight in my case.”

“How can you be so certain?”

“Because it’s lust. I’m not thinking with anything other than my…” I trailed off, almost blushing. The conversation was definitely out of the norm.

“And what happens when you catch your prey?”

“We’ll have sex.”

“And then?”

I threw my hands up into the air. Why was I talking about Hope with my mother? “I have no idea.”

She smirked. “Fifty bucks says you won’t be able to let her go.” I side-eyed her, and the smirk grew into a grin. “You don’t want to take that bet, do you?”

I sighed and rubbed my face. No, I didn’t want to take that bet, because deep down I knew having her once would never be enough.