Chapter 71
I slammed my fist into the punching bag, feeling a surge of anger coursing through my veins. I hit the bag again and again and again until my knuckles felt sore. I was not weating any boxing gloves because I needed to feel something other than the anger and the embarrassment that I was drowning in and the punches were not helping at all.
“Why did I let myself care about her?” I growled, my voice echoing off the walls of the palace gym. If I had not allowed myself get interested in any thing that had to do with her, if I had just seen for all that she was, a maid, things would be so much better and I would not be trying to stabilise my emotions by hitting a punching bag and watching the skin peel off my knuckles
I wiped the sweat off my forehead and tried to steady my breath, the bottle of water that I had taken out of the mini fridge called to me but I was determined not to have anything to drink or eat until I had managed to get her out of my system.
I did not deserve food or drinks, how could I even think of it right now when I was going through a major crisis? It was more serious than I presumed it to be and I had ignored it for far way no long and now it was starting to bite me in the a**. could not f***g think straight because of her and now I was going through hoops to save her, someone that I ought to have killed? What sort of sorcery was this?!
The fact that I wanted to spend time with her was what annoyed me the most. How could I want to spend time with her? She was nothing but a s***e, a s**e whose former mate was the cause of my parent’s death. Could I really stoop any lower than this? Could I go any lower?! Loving a sl**e?!!
I thought back to the day I rescued Kira, how my wolf had instantly connected with her. If only I had acted right then, if only I had killed her and gotten it over with, I would be free from all the s**t that I was going through. I would not be battling with emotions that I didn’t want to be a part of. I hated myself for ignoring the signs that my wolf gave me.
I was warned but I had pushed those feelings aside, telling myself I didn’t need a mate. I was good on my own. I was doing fine, everything in my life was going smoothly and even if I wanted to settle down with a woman, it was going to be one of my own choosing that I would be able to pick according to my needs and Mara seemed to fit the role perfectly until now.
Why did I care about the sex? Why did I care about the way she smiled? The sound of her voice, the way she smelled, the way she walked. I knew the sound her laugh and it echoed in my head whenever I tried to sleep. I was so interested in everything she said and when she was quiet, I was wondering what she was thinking. It felt like I was going crazy trying to figure her out and I thought it was something that I could easily get over but I could not and now I had competition. I hadn’t figured her out and f***g had competition
Now, my brother Brax was subtly hinting that he was interested in her, and it was driving me mad. I didn’t know whether to back out or fight for her or if she was even worth fighting for to begin with.
“I’m such a fool,” I muttered, punching the bag again. “I told Brax to stay away from her, but here I am, caring about her like a lovesick pup
1 paced back and forth in front of the mirror, my reflection staring back at me with a scowl. “I can reject her as my mate,” I told myself. “My wolf might be mad, but it’ll get over it. I’ll get over it.”NôvelDrama.Org © 2024.
But the thought of rejecting her didn’t sit right with me. It made me feel annoyed, like I was losing something precious. How was it something precious if it was a **e? I felt like I was dwelling on the fact that she was a sl***e, (which I made her to be) so I would be able to get over my feelings for her but I still was not able to. She was still the only thing I could think of every time I closed my eyes and the thought of her with someone else did not sit well with me one bit.
I couldn’t shake the image of Brax and Kira together, their faces close, their bodies touching. It consumed me with rage. How good they looked together was even more annoying because I was not the only one that saw it. I overheard some of the maids whispering about how they thought something was going on between them and how good they looked together.
I thought about all the times I had seen them together, laughing and smiling. I thought about how Brax had rescued her from me the very day he got back to the pack, how he had been by her side ever since. I wondered if that was when his attraction for her began. I wondered if that was what should have avoided instead and not falling in love with her in the first place.
“I need to stay away from her.” I told myself, my voice firm “Shes affecting me too much, and that’s not good I continued. to work out my muscles flexing as I punched and kicked the bag Sweat dripped down my face, but I didn’t stop until I was exhausted I couldn’t stop until I wore myself out. If I wore myself out completely then I wouldn’t have to think of her, she would be nothing to me if I couldn’t even feel my own limbs.
As I walked back to my bedroom. I felt a sense of resolve. I would stay away from Kira, no matter how much my wolf protested I couldn’t let myself get caught up in these feelings again. If Brax was going to have her then let him have her, I could not stand the thought of having to compete with it own bother for a s***e. It would be too much of a shame, for both me and the entire pack. I would be a disgrace to my f***g family and that was not something that I wanted. At all.
But as I lay in bed, my mind wandered back to her. I couldn’t shake the thought of her smile, her laugh, her sparkling eyes. groaned, rolling over onto my side, my muscles hunting like hell As soon as I got comfortable again, she snuck into my mind and took over the entire place
Her smell was amazing, her hair was gorgeous, I had never thought that the colour brown was an interesting colour until I saw her eyes. I had seen brown eyes all the time or had I? I was not the type to pay attention to the colour of eyes but I knew hers. I knew the dress that matched the colour of her eyes.
If I saw something that slightly resembled them, I instantly thought of her. Everything reminded me of her like I was going insane and sometimes I even heard her voice when she wasn’t there.
“Why can’t just forget about her?” I whispered into the darkness. I thought about all the times I had tried to push her away. all the times I had told myself I didn’t need her. But deep down, I knew I couldn’t. Kira had gotten under my skin, and I didn’t know how to get her out.
I tossed and turned, my mind racing with thoughts of her. I finally fell asleep, but my dreams were filled with images of Kira and Brax together.
I woke up with a scream, my heart racing. I was soaked in sweat and I was so annoyed that I was bothered. Why would I even have a dream like that?!
I knew I had to stay away from her, but I also knew it wouldn’t be easy. My wolf was drawn to her, and I couldn’t deny the connection we shared.
1 got out of bed and began to pace back and forth in my room. I had to find a way to get over her, to move on with my life. But every time I thought about her, my heart ached. I knew I had to make a choice, to either embrace my feelings or reject them once and for all. But I didn’t know which way to go.